If You See Da Police… Warner Brother


Just when you thought we might get some breathing room, another one comes off the production line. Australia’s opening stocks finally looked a little thin, after over a decade of merrily smashing the shit out of every bowler put in front of them. Then this kid David Warner goes out and blasts 89 off 43 balls in a Twenty20 against South Africa.

He brought up his 50 in a fairly memorable way too, hitting Dale Steyn, probably the best bowler in the world right now, for consecutive sixes off the first two balls he faced from the South African tearaway. The half century took him 19 balls. His first international innings. 22 years old. 89 runs. Off 43 balls. Six sixes. The numbers will break your heart.

His shots were madly audacious too, cranking Ntini bouncers over the boundary, and paddling Steyn (Steyn!) for six (six!) with the first ball of his he faced. How does that happen? A young kid, considered lucky to be picked at all, facing the most feared bowler in the world right now… At what point does his mental processing malfunction enough for that to become an option?

Sounds like the guy’s kinda mad anyway, trying out a double-sided bat, so he doesn’t have to do that annoying switching-hands thing when reverse-sweeping into the stands. So it looks like Australia have found their Jesse Ryder. Only he’s younger, more fearless and scores quicker.

The only faint glimmer of hope for the rest of world cricket is contained in this profile of the brothers in The Age. It describes older brother Steve Warner, who plays in the second team for their Eastern Suburbs club, as “hard-hitting and hard-living”. Just like our Jesse.

If the genes for both elements have carried down into the prodigal younger son then we might get the occasional moment of respite. If not, we’re all doomed.

– Duncan

PS – If anyone missed the classic mid-’90s t-shirt reference in the title, here’s what you’re missing out on. Immaculately modeled too.




Filed under Cricket, News

2 responses to “If You See Da Police… Warner Brother

  1. Tim

    Its funny you should point out that “hard living” element – we had picked him as a bit of a piss head based on his physicality but that confirms it – we also noted some discontent with the rest of the team (based on Ricky Pointings measured comments of how well he had batted and the “warm” reaction he got from the rest of the Australians after getting out). We attributed this to big headedness which again seemed to be confirmed in his interviews afterwards – so yeah I reckon we have a few possible outs. Also remember that both Vincent and Sinclair had good first innings’ – i’d still take Guptill over Warner.

  2. Yeah he’s got that beery body shape already – or as I heard the ABC (with Neil Manthorp! So good to hear his voice) put it, he looks like a hamburgerologist. And yeah, some of our crappest cricketers in recent memory have had fantastic debuts. Warner’s innings was uncommon in its savagery, but what Guptill did is a far more difficult – and more valuable – task in my opinion, so I’m with you all the way on that last point.

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