Slow News Day: A Lost Art.


Sport Mascotry is a true expressive artform, and no mascot had more effect on my childhood (for better or worse) than Rambo, the Canterbury Rams Ram.  Is he the last great sports mascot? Probably.  Some wondered whether there was even a human being under there, or if he was literally a wild mutant ram/man in a basketball uniform terrorising Cowles Stadium . Either way, he was very very good at what he did, and – we thought – he was to be the last of the revolutionary sports mascots. Until now…

This might just be the result of having too much time on your hands, (I’m guessing that a mascot has a fair amount of down time between games and groupies) but kudos to Clutch the Bear for the dedication he has to his craft . While other mascots focus on the mini-tramp and bad dance moves, the Houston Rockets mascot has refined his game and made what will surely become the key new developement in his industry: Stand still, pretend you’re an inflatable, wait… wait… then pounce & sceam. It’s the perfect mix of patience, timing, and child cruelty. Plus it’s nice to see a mascot take it off tha hardwood and out to tha concourse y’all.
The Houston Rockets organisation apparently allows Clutch to do this regularly throughout the season, and when you get about 1 minute into the clip below, you start to understand why.


Forward thinking, and elegantly simple. Basically, Clutch is a frightening bastard.

This is the kind of innovation that the NBA needs to foster. The inclusion of H-O-R-S-E at All Star Weekend was a step in the right direction, although I can’t help but think that the whole affair would’ve been more entertaining if the competitors took this kind of approach:


That kind of play sends a message to your opposition, and is a nice subtle nod to the sponsor GEICO – everyone’s a winner.

– Justin



Filed under Basketball, NBA, Reminiscing

3 responses to “Slow News Day: A Lost Art.

  1. The great tragedy in losing the Rams to the newly formed Canterbury Cougars, is that Rambo will be no more. Say goodbye to the last of the great mascots.

    I assume the Cougars mascot will be women in her late thirties/early forties, holding a wine glass and hitting on younger fans.

  2. Remember the time Shaq the Cat, Otago basketball/rugby mascot got disciplined for repeatedly ‘gesturing’ at the crowd with his tail between his legs?
    Can’t beleive the Rams are no more.

  3. hah i remember shaq. the saints (formerly exchequer saints) had a gorilla, if i’m not mistaken. i forget the name. madgwick stadium used to go off for saints games. this was back in the kerry boagni era.

    wow, i just googled kerry boagni. check out his draft class:

    len bias…and stephen curry’s dad.

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