Category Archives: Motorsport

New Zealand's Next Top Model Power Rankings 3

A tearful Hosanna from New Zealand's Next Top Model

"I'm not a hooker!"

It was an emotional round for everyone on NZNTM. Some of the key contenders had very forgettable weeks, old nags found new life in their brittle bones, and one of the early favourites had to pack her knives and go.

The ejection of Ajoh, far more so than Rhiannon’s departure last week, signaled the end of innocence for the models. To see her and Rebecca-Rose’s googly head alongside one another in the bottom two was the first real tremulous moment of the series, and in sending home one of the strongest competitors for one case of the bad attitudes (“in Africa it’s not good for girls to open their legs”!!) they signaled that they’re prepared to do like they need to, and shed some potential winner’s blood from way out.

A quick mini-ranking of the judges first up: CMJ comes out on top every time, but I’m mystified and half in love with his bizarre clanging outbursts; first “it’s like they’re putting on make-up in a trainwreck” (not during one, but rushing to the scene simply to pretty themselves up? Amazing.) and now “she sat on an energiser battery and started going crazy!”. For a guy who can be so cutting and articulate they feel almost calculatedly awful. Sisarich is in danger of being too cool for the show, needs to engage with the drama more, while Sara is definitely improving, but still plays the model’s mom over the arch dismisser, and needs to get harsher for sure. We probably need even more tears, terrifying as that sounds. Anyway, to the rankings:

1. (Last Week: 6) Laura

The light in the eyes is strong with this one. After a disastrous showing last week, that made you wonder whether the Wellingtonian had the right head game to take the comp, she pulled out a stunning reversal. Her form through the trying gymnastics round was immaculate, and showed a determination and engagement with the process that had been hitherto hidden from view. It was a week tailored for the Warehouse catalogue set (TL, Victoria, Lucy) over the young and couture-centric ones, and for her to back up her win in the gym round (and strong showing with the props) with a big day behind the wheel with some Michael Hill Jeweler (for some reason that felt even cheaper than Hannahs) on her arm was all the evidence you needed that this girl came to win. Continue reading



Filed under Motorsport, News

Liveblogging: The Halberg Awards

It’s t-27 minutes until the start of The Halberg Awards, the venerable sporting institution which has seen off the ultra-crap People’s Choice Awards and according to one press release, turned the Vector Arena into ‘Auckland’s largest dining room!’ Which you must admit would almost border on mildly interesting if you were at a doctor’s waiting room and they only had dated back issues of NZ Home & Garden to distract you.

Anyway, just while we’re filling in time, here’s a picture of Murray Halberg, the man who started at all, and one of the original gangstas of New Zealand’s killer athletics era. There’s some talk that Vili’s gold will lead to a wave of nostalgia for those glory days and get her the overall Halberg, but let’s just state for the permanent record that DeadBall (or at least Duncan. Dave is here but I’ve not asked him) is opposed to any such award. As well as she did, the Brickyard is history, and anything other than a Scott Dixon Supreme Award will PISS. ME. OFF.

One final thing before we get into the awards proper: I do think it’s super cool that there’s a Supreme Award winner. They don’t do that anywhere, not the Oscars, Crufts or the VMAs… That’s all of them right? Actually they do in Crufts, but I’m pretty sure they don’t do that very often at other awards ceremonies, and it’s definitely cool. Continue reading


Filed under Athletics, Awards, League, Motorsport, News, Rugby league